This weekend, my house got eerily – but excitingly – quiet.
You may remember that my eldest son is at camp all summer as a counsellor. This weekend, the younger two headed off to their camps as campers, leaving me with almost no responsibilities for two whole weeks.
So why am I so proud?
Raising kids is hard – trying to make sure they’re well-read, well-mannered, well-fed and generally kind, feeling individuals is a herculean task. But every once and a while you have a spectacular day when you realize you’re doing an okay job – they really are turning out to be really great human beings. For me, that was today.
First out the door was my daughter. She is heading off to her island camp with a school friend this year. She’s been thinking for a while, and talking to me about strategies to integrate her classmate with the camp friends she’s had for some years now. She seems to innately understand that this could be a tricky thing, mixing these two worlds.
She knows she needs to encourage, to help sparks start – but that she also needs to step back at the right time to let those sparks turn into the gentle flames of new friendships that don’t depend on her. So while she plans to do a lot with her friend, she’s also looking at taking a couple of activities her friend isn’t particularly interested in, to allow the space for that to happen.
Next out was my second son. He also has a school friend at camp, although they ended up at the same camp organically a year or so, and didn’t realize each other was headed there in the past. This year is their leader-in-training (LIT) year and they’re anxious to learn, to show their stuff and prove they’re ready for employment next year. Now, kids seem to forget that parents in the front seat can hear their conversations, so it’s always interesting to catch up on what’s important to them. So along with learning about summer plans, I also learned that my son and his girlfriend had a long conversation about whether it was important to get a letter from camp. Apparently, she doesn’t feel the need for one, but I was proud he thought enough of her feelings to find out.
When we got to camp – the same one where my eldest is a counsellor – the two brothers, who hadn’t seen each other in a month, ran toward each other and threw themselves in each others’ arms! These are two boys who fought like cats and dogs when they were young. Boys who were sent to camp at different times on purpose: that way there would be less summer vacation together during which to bicker. Their relationship has come a long way, and the fact that they would hug in a public place was a real win.
But the crème-de-la-crème? While I watched this display of brotherly love from the fence, the camp director came up to me to say hello; my boys have been at this camp for about eight years, so we’re a known commodity. My heart almost burst with pride when the director started talking about how my eldest is faring in his second year of employment there. With the kind of passion that you know isn’t just a few kind words for a parent, he compared my “baby” to a fabulous former staffer who was well-liked by campers, staff and parents alike. The kind of counsellor, he said, who comes along only every ten years or so. Who always looks for what needs to be done and does it. Who volunteers for extra duties. Who can be counted on.
And what mother doesn’t love to hear that about her kid!
